From the desk of Hindsight is 20/20

A quick note of Dos and Don’ts for aspiring writers and self-publishers.*

Friends. I know that you have just been waiting with bated breath, palms sweaty, heart racing for The Fulcrum which I said I was going to publish on 19 February. I just know it.

And now … nothing.

Since I am currently somewhat time-poor in making good on that commitment, I can’t really spend hours on writing out reasons for why I didn’t make it. So instead, I offer you this as explanation: a short pre-blog to the blog about self-publishing.

It might offer some insights.

*Actually, just ‘don’ts’. It’s all just don’ts.

Don’t

  1. Choose to use American spelling without also adopting the “dialogue” style convention (UK/SA is ‘single quotes’) and then only remember to do that five days before you said you’d publish especially if you are working on a manuscript that is more than 200k words. This is a bad, bad, bad idea.
  2. Think you can do it yourself. You can’t. And related…
  3. Think this is cheap. The less money you have the longer this will take. The asshole fell out of my work income this year and so I was unable to use all the people I wanted to: the editors, the proofreaders, the book cover specialists, the Amazon specialists. I did not factor in the INTENSE extra work this would be. I don’t know why I didn’t factor that in. Hysterical blindness is my only excuse.
  4. Think that Amazon is ‘oh so easy lemon squeezey super breezey’. It’s not.
  5. Underestimate just how much editing you need, especially if it is your first novel. I apologise to my readers who read the The Fulcrum while they still had to trip over the thousand thousand ‘as ifs’, ‘settles’, ‘suddenlys’, ‘moments’, ‘seemed likes’ etc etc (I wish I was joking oh my GOD I realised too late the nervous, insecure word ticks of a first-time novelist FAR TOO LATE. ‘Just a quick double-check’ turned into ‘staring into the abyss of my own ineptitude’. Last week was great, guys.)

Okay that’s all I have time for because I am seriously SERIOUSLY loading this to Amazon today and I still have a TON of work to do on it. This doesn’t mean it will be available today, of course. Amazon might take another 24 to 48 to whateveritfeelslike hours to approve it.

So there you have it.

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